I have a love-hate relationship with food.
I love ice cream and brownies, but I hate that I can barely zipper the one pair of fat pants that I kept as a reminder of “I-will-never-be-this-size-again.”
As you are well aware, sunshine, our emotions significantly impact our health, and right now, I am physically carrying emotional burdens–nearly 10 extra pounds of emotional baggage.
This has resulted in a new size dress and feelings of shame and hypocrisy. #thestruggleisreal
Last week, on Valentine’s Day to be exact, I had a breakdown. Full on couldn’t-catch-my-breath-mascara-running-down-my-cheeks-kind of breakdown.
It wasn’t pretty.
And to top it off, it was in a public place–a dressing room.
(Three-way mirrors and fluorescent lights are not my friends.)
You see, since moving, I’ve had some major changes, many in my physical activity and routines.
I haven’t been teaching six fitness classes/week like I did in Cleveland.
My lingering knee injury persists which prevents me from running and doing higher intensity workouts.
And I have been less-than-motivated to push myself through challenging workouts.
Yadda. Yadda. Yadda.
When paired with the emotional transitions as of late, these changes have lead to weight gain.
I thought that my numerous weight loss tips and tricks that I’ve used to maintain my 120+weight loss over the decades and even coach other people through would be simple to get me back on track.
Negative.
I’ve been more frustrated than ever. #feellikeahypocrite
On Valentine’s Day, in the dressing room, I resorted to a double-digit dress size that I vowed, “I would never wear again.” #neversaynever
Now hear me out.
Whether you have 5 lbs. or 50 lbs to lose, how we think about our bodies and our relationships with food and exercise, and most importantly, if we believe in God’s power to change us, these are key ingredients to our success.
That night I left the store, new blue dress in hand (pictured above) crying all of the way home.
God spoke to me.
In 1997, I lost 75lbs. It was start of the healing process.
God revealed Himself to me, and I first discovered a relationship with Him.
Weight loss version 1.0.
From 1998-2016, God continued to transform me, (Ezekiel 36:26), and I dropped another 50lbs.
Weight loss version 2.0.
Now, 21 years later, God is ready to reveal Himself to me in a new and more intimate way. He’s calling me into the wilderness yet again to experience another facet of His character. (Hosea 2:14)
Weight loss version 3.0
What about you, sunshine?
Have you ever been frustrated with your weight or are you there right now?
Perhaps He providing this plateau as an opportunity for you to recognize and experience His presence in a new and more intimate way?
Lean in.
Listen.
Learn. |