|In the coaching world, you often hear the expression, “Don’t be attached to an outcome.”
As a highly-motivated-and-driven person, this has been challenging for me to understand and to be really honest,sunshine, to adopt as a healthy life practice.
Until a few years ago, my philosophy was:
Define a goal.
Go get it.
And when resistance happens, keep going.
This was exhausting.
Now hear me out, sunshine.
I am not saying that goals aren’t important and that it’s not important to set them or strive to achieve them, but what I am saying is that the sole focus of a goal mustn’t be on what we get when ________ (fill in your personal goal here, sunshine).
I was further convicted to adopt this mantra when studying about the sin of worry.
What happens if I…?
What if this doesn’t work…?
When will I…?
How will I..?
Why doesn’t he…?
Worry is a control mechanism, a distrust of God’s divine care and planning.
So when thinking about what to share for our October Challenge (we’re in week 4, btw) I wanted to share something that would be tangible and meaningful to support emotional wellness.
I know that worry plagues many, so I thought Pope John XXIII’s Daily Decalogue might speak to someone who is worried about the future or regretting the past. That’s how worry operates, ya know? Dwelling on mistakes of the past and stressing over things yet to come.
Years ago I was given one of those page-a-day-calendars where you tear off each day (pictured above); this is where I first read the Pope’s message. I have kept December 10-11, 2012 in my day planner for years.
The Pope’s sentiments are simple, self-explanatory, yet profoundly weighty.
His ten daily commitments are reminders to not attach to any outcomes–as he commits each of these sentiments, “Only for today…”
1. Only for today, I will seek to live the livelong day positively without wishing to solve the problems of my life all at once.
2. Only for today, I will take the greatest care of my appearance: I will dress modestly; I will not raise my voice; I will be courteous in my behavior; I will not criticize anyone; I will not claim to improve or to discipline anyone except myself.
3. Only for today, I will be happy in the certainty that I was created to be happy, not only in the other world but also in this one.
4. Only for today, I will adapt to circumstances, without requiring all circumstances to be adapted to my own wishes.
5. Only for today, I will devote ten minutes of my time to some good reading, remembering that just as food is necessary to the life of the body, so good reading is necessary to the life of the soul.
6. Only for today, I will do one good deed and not tell anyone about it.
7. Only for today, I will do at least one thing I do not like doing; and if my feelings are hurt, I will make sure no one notices.
8. Only for today, I will make a plan for myself: I may not follow it to the letletter, but I will make it. And I will be on guard against two evils: hastiness and indecision.
9. Only for today, I will firmly believe, despite appearances, that the good Providence of God cares for me as no one else who exists in this world.
10. Only for today, I will have no fears. In particular, I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful and to believe in goodness. Indeed, for twelve hours I can certainly do what might cause me consternation were I to believe I had to do it all my life
Do any of these resonate with you, sunshine?
What is your personal “Only for today” message that you are committing to this week?
As always, I’d love to hear from you.
Simply reply to this message if any part of today’s message speaks to you.