When stressed, I binge-eat cake batter for dinner.
When I fear I’ve lost control, I doubt God and worry.
When I’m angry, I swear like a drunken sailor.
When I spite God for not “providing” me the husband I’ve been praying for, I enter toxic, ungodly relationships.
When needing to feel superior, I gossip.
When feeling less-than, I weigh myself thinking the number will reflect my worth.

I don’t share these personal behaviors with you as an open confession (I’ve already shared them with God–repeatedly), but I share them openly and honestly to serve someone reading this today.

I share to create a space of compassion and empathy. 

I share to offer you a safe place to ask for prayer for your struggles, too, sunshine.

I share because I’d rather be an honest sinner than a lying hypocrite
I lived too long as a hypocrite; it does not serve me, God or the world well.

While I have come a long from where I once was (hello, eating an entire pizza at 3:00a.m. and having my roommate take out my contacts because I was too drunk to keep my eyes open), I still struggle. But while I once was so concerned with how others would perceive and judge me, I now celebrate my imperfections; they demonstrate my need for and reliance upon God. It’s the embodiment of grace. 

God has healed many parts of me and continues to do a great and mighty work in me, but truth be told, the demons assigned to me are in constant pursuit of my joy and peace. 

And the same is true for you, sunshine.

The enemy studies our every weakness and offers temptations to detour us from our purpose.

As you set your mind to memorizing scripture this week [letter J], I encourage you to consider the areas that you might need to get real with yourself.
And honest with God. 

Get quiet and forgive yourself and release judgement from others, for we know that the speck in our brother’s eyes is small compared to the plank in our own.

With love for a great week,

ABC Scripture memorization [J] Matt 7:1-2:
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged.
For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged,
and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

‘Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?'”
Matt 7:1-4